


Letters

by multifickru25



Category: The 100
Genre: Clexa, F/F, Primfaya, space kru
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-10
Updated: 2021-02-15
Packaged: 2021-03-09 00:20:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 15
Words: 13,121
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27485662
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/multifickru25/pseuds/multifickru25
Summary: The story of what happens during primfaya only this time Lexa didn’t die and Madi sadly doesn’t exist.OrAdded Character Lilia is distraught by loosing Clarke and Lexa in Primfaya and is now written them letters from space.
Relationships: Bellamy Blake/Clarke Griffin, Clarke Griffin & Lexa, Emori/John Murphy (The 100), Monty Green & Harper McIntyre
Kudos: 2





	1. Chapter 1

"She should be back by now." Bellamy says in a worried voice. I look down at the time on my red suit. Only 5 minutes until we need to leave to escape primfaya. 

I look up at Bellamy then I run my head to look at Lexa, she looks panicked but is trying to stay calm. She looks down at me and puts a hand on my shoulder to comfort me. "She'll be here." 

"We can't wait anymore!" Raven yells from the ship. "We have to go now!" We can't leave Clarke, we have to wait, Lexa is right shell come. 

Bellamy hesitates then he starts walking towards the others. He takes my hand in his pulling to come with him. "We have to go." he whispers sadly. I start to follow then look back at Lexa, she hasn't moved. She is still starting out waiting for Clarke.

I have known Lexa for as long as I can remember and I've never seen her love someone as much as she loves Clarke. Clarke changed her, taught her how to live. Clarke taught her peace and I know Lexa can't live without her.

"Lexa," I whisper, walking back to her. "We have to go." After a second she finally takes her eyes away from where Clarke will enter and looks down at me with only pain in her eyes. She touches my arm gently and draws me closer to her.

"You have to go with them, but I have to go find Clarke. I can't leave her." I feel tears start to run down my face and Bellamy walks closer to us. Lexa hugs me trying to comfort me. 

"Earth is my home, my people are here, Clarke is out there and I need to find her. I'm a nightblood there is a chance ill survive but I have to find Clarke." I start sobbing into her shoulder and she hugs me tighter. 

"But I'm your people." I choke out. Lexa places her hands on my face and looks into my eyes. "I know, I'm so sorry Lilia. I- i can't live knowing I didn't try to save her." A tear slids down her cheek and I nod pulling her back into a hug. 

"WE HAVE TO GO NOW." Raven yells. Lexa and I detach and she kisses my forhead. "I'm sorry, Ai hod yu in." She then turns and runs out.

"NO. No Lexa come back!" I yell trying to run after her but Bellamy grabs me and carries me towards ship. "No let me go with her!" I kick and struggle trying to escape his grip.

He carrys me like a baby pulls me into his chest letting me cry whilst he holds my head arms wrapped around me. My mind is blank I just lost everything. I understand why she left but now I have no one left. 

There is no one left that I love. I don't know these people I'm trusting my life with. Heck I don't even know most of there names. 

Bellamy straps me into my seat. He takes my hand and squizes it. He just lost Clarke to and he is leaving his sister behind. Bellamy understands how I feel.

As the ship lifts into the sky fear envalops me. Were going to die I think. I start to cry more, I can't help it, I know its weak but right now I feel weak like I have nothjng left to give.

All my life I have been accepted, praised even for my blood but right now I feel like a freikdraina. An outsider, I don't know anyone, I'm a grounder, I lived in Polis my whole life and I'm only 12. All this is weakness and I don't know how I'm going to survive anymore.

Everyone is talking quietly here and there around me but sadness and fear have taken over me and I can't here anything.


	2. 2

"Lilia." Bellamy taps my shoulder. "Look." He points to the small window. We're in space, we are in the sky. The sky I used to look up at with Lexa when I was younger counting the stars with her after a full day of training with the other nightbloods.

Now all those people are dead. My friends heads cut off by Ontari and Lexa in Primfaya. Still the sky is so beautiful, looking out the window I feel free like everything that happened on the ground doesn't have to exist here.

I look around at everyone else they all look really worried. Then reality comes back and I realise we are probably going to die. I look down at my wrist where it says how much oxygen I have left. 20%, not a lot.

"I have 15%." Says Murphy as if he read my mind. Emori - I think that's her name, she was the one that Abby wanted to use mine and Lunas bone marrow on.- looks down at her wrist and sighs. "I have 17%." Murphy half laughs before saying. "Well that's good, means I won't have to watch you die." Then he pulls Emori into a side ways hug.

We all look hopeless. No one has any hope that we will survive except Raven who looks happy and excited. "Welp it's time for you to do your thing." Bellamy says to Raven. She nods and starts to unstrap herself.

As she does she starts floating. It's the most magical thing I have ever seen, she looks so free. She pulls her self down proceeding to open the bottom of the ship and pulling herself out in to space.

We watch her float towards what they call the Ark for a few moments before Bellamy unstraps and pulls himself towards the window to watch Raven closer. I push myself up in my seat a bit trying to see past him, space is so big and captivating I wish I could space walk like Raven.

Bellamy notices me trying to see better and comes back to me. "You wanna float in zero g." He asks whilst unstrapping me. I nod and he holds my arm and waste as I start to lift into the air. 

I feel weightless. Then reality kicks in and my heart starts beating faster and I start gasping for air. "Here look out there that's the entire universe." Bellamy says holding me steady to calm me.

"It's normal for your heart to race whilst floating in zero g." The Asian boy says who was sitting next to Raven. I still haven't picked up on his name but he told Clarke that he lost Jasper. Clarke told me stories about Jasper how he always used to wear goggles and he was always with his best friend who's name I can't remember so I'm guessing it's the boy who just spoke to me.

I nod and he nods back and smiles. I make eyes contact with him and he holds it. "Lilia." I whisper pointing at myself. I'm guessing if I don't know his name he won't know mine and neither will most of the others here. "Monty." He replies. 

I look back out into space and feel weightless again. Then I turn around and look at the girl next to Monty, hoping she'll understand and tell me her name. I'm going to be spending 5 years with these people may as well get to know them.

"Hapar." She says kindly and gives me a warm smile. I turn to the grounder girl next to Harper I've seen her before.

She is Azgeda, before we left Bellamy caught her performing their self execution ritual. She looks nice enough but I could tell that Lexa was very apprehensive around her and since she was in Polis often she must have worked for Queen Nia. I don't think I can trust her but I'll try.

I give her a small smile and a nod. "Echo." She whispers looking down. She was the one everyone was talking about, that Octavia banished from Wonkru. 

I move closer to her and look her in the eyes before saying "We all made mistakes on the ground this is our second chance at living." She nods and a tear runs down her face. I think she knows that no one here properly trust her. 

I move back and turn to the boy I know to be called Murphy but I'd still like him to say his own name. Clarke always told me that he was bad and made bad decisions and did back things but from what I've seen so far he only does things to survive and to protect Emori who he loves. Just like the rest of us.

He looks at me then looks down and laughs. "Really grounder princess you don't know my name, I tried to stop them from taking your bone marrow." Clarke always said he was very sarcastic.

"You do not know my name," I say "Grounder princess is not a name." He laughs again. "Muphy," he says "and your name is Lila." I nod and turn slightly to face Emori.

Lexa told me that she was a Frekdraina but to treat her the same as everyone else because she is. And I know she is but everyone has always told me to fear them so when I looked down at her hand with duct tape around her glove so it will fit I feel scared and move back a bit.

She notices and looks away clearly hurt. I keep looking at her waiting for her to say her name but she doesn't, she doesn't even look up from her lap.

"Sorry." I say and she looks up. "What is your name so I don't have to keep referring to you as Murphy's lover." She looks up her eyes still show hurt but she smiles and whispers "Emori."

I move back to the window where Bellamy is. He moves over so I can see out. I have got to know Bellamy during the lead up to Primfaya. 

"Come on Raven you can do it." He whispers just load enough for me to here as I am right next to him. Then suddenly the Ark lights up. 

"They did it!" Bellamy says with relief. "What Clarke really did it she got the electric tower to work?" Murphy says in a mix of surprise and relief.

Clarke did it she saved us. Maybe Lexa did get to her on time and they're safe. I move to look at the window facing the ground hoping that the ground hasn't completely exploded so that Clarke and Lexa might live.

Unfortunately all I see is a firey mess of radiation.

It just can't be true. How can the great Wanheda commander of death and Heda be dead. 

I pull myself away from the window and look at Bellamy he wears the same expression I feel. Lost and alone except he still has his friends.

Ravens head pops back inside the ship and she pulls herself back into her seat. "Bellamy, Lilia get back in your seat we only have a few minutes before we run out of air." The brown haired girl instructs us.

We quickly move back to out seats and strap ourselves back in and I feel the ship moving closer to the Ark again. "Brace yourselves it's going to be bumpy entering the Ark." Raven says slowly.

The Ark come closer and closer until I'm thrown forward then jerked backward by my seat belt. "Everyone good?" Bellamy asks after a moment. I let out a breath I didn't even know I was holding until now and nod.

We survived the first part now Raven and Monty just have to get the air on. "Come on we've got to get moving." Raven rushes, everyone already moving out the ship.

Everyone starts unstrapping and getting out. I look down at my wrist 9% air loft, I shouldn't have spaced walk I don't have enough air left.

I start to panic at the thought that I might not be able to breath soon and fumble with my seatbelt unable to get it off with my hands shaking.

I start panicking more and breathing to fast. I feel like I'm hyperventilating and I can't move. That's it this is how I'll die, stuck in a seat in the middle of space.

Raven notices my panic and starts to come back for me. "Get to the generator and start working Monty I'll be right there." Raven tells Monty.

She turns back to me as I still struggle trying to breath and get out at the same time. My hands shake as I try to unstrap again. Raven places her hands on mine and hold them for a moment.

"Let me," she says "you just focus of breathing." She laughs slightly. I start focusing on my breathing and try to remember what Clarke taught me about making your breathing go back to normal.

Whenever the past commanders would wake Lexa from her sleep with terrifying memories of death and war Clarke would always help calm her. Clarke used to tell me if it was ever just Lexa and I together and she started to breath uncontrollably I was to trying breathing with her then slowly bring both our breaths back to normal.

It always works so as Raven pulls me out of my seat and into the Ark I try focusing on her breath and try to copy it. 

Raven looks down at me "You good now?" She asks I nod and she pulls us both into a run towards the others.

"Have you done it yet Monty?" Raven asks as she pulls up next to him. "I'm working on it!" He replies stressed. "Everyone just sit next to the vents." Raven tells us.

I sit down next to Harper across from Emori and Murphy. She puts her arm around me and pulls me in closer to her.

The only people who have ever comforted me like this is Lexa and Clarke. Lexa when I was younger whenever I was injured badly from training. And Clarke when we thought we had lost Lexa.

It feels good to be comforted again but it also reminds me of all I have lost. I move closer to Harper and bury my head in her chest. She holds me tighter. I feel her chest rise and full and we wait.

Then it stops. Her chest stops rising and I look up at her, she's not breathing and she looks desperate. I rush to take of my mask and get my oxygen tank.

I take Harpers mask of and bring the oxygen mask to her lips and wait for her to start breathing. After a moment her chest starts to rise and fall again and she looks at me.

That's when I realise that I'm not breathing I can't breath. There is not oxygen in the air and I'm suffocating. Harper quickly puts the gas mask to my face and air fills my lungs.

I look around and see Emori doing the same for Raven. Then their's runs out and Murphy shares his. Soon ours runs out and Echo is sharing hers.

I have no idea how all this works but it looks like Monty is close to starting up the air. I hope. 

I look over at Emori, Raven and Murphy and see they are all slumped over not breathing. I turn to Harper and who has the gas and see she isn't breathing either. I grab the gas mask and try to breath in but there is no air. 

I notice Monty is only just still breathing trying to tell Bellamy what to do. I start to panic after all that all the sacrifice we are still going to die.

"Ai gom plei ste odon." I choke out before everything goes blank. Then I here gasps and see blurry shadows a above me. Is this what heaven is or is it hell...

If it is heaven will I see Clarke and Lexa and Aden and my mum and dad soon. I feel my body being pulled. Then a cool breeze hits my face. Then laughs.

"Lilia." A familiar sweet voice whispers. It doesn't belong to Clarke or Lexa so I can't be in heaven. Wait it's a male voice. "Lilia." There it is again some one is moving me closer to the breeze.

I tear open my eyes and see Bellamys blurry face come into view. "I- I- we did it." I gasp for breath and feel my chest rise. "We did it." We laughs.

We are alive, we actually made it. Clarke and Lexa's sacrifice wasn't for nothing. I sit up and wrap my arms around Bellamy. "They did it... so we could do it." I say relieved.

Bellamy hugs me back tightly. "Yeah, yeah they did." He says. I look around at everyone smiling and relieved that we survived one more day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m going to try to have an upload schedule of every Sunday but i dont know how that’ll go... also is anyone even reading this??


	3. The First Letter

Dear Clarke and Lexa,

I know you have been gone a while now, almost 4 months but everyday I wake up thinking about you and all I've lost. But if you see this you saved us. We are all here alive.

Monty suggested I write you both letters to help with the grief I'm feeling. Obviously you know that I decided to try it because I am writing this.

People always say that grief gets easier over time but that's never been true and everyone who has lost someone knows it.

I guess what I'm saying by that is deep down I think I have some stupid naive hope that you're both still alive. 

I know it's silly but Lexa before you left you told me you had a chance of surviving being a nightblood. 

I don't really know what to say in this letter and your not even seeing it. Monty says that I should say how I feel but I don't know how I feel.

I feel like nothing. The last four months have been strange. Monty got the algae farm working and that's about it. We just kinda sit around not knowing what's next.

After we got the air on in the Ark and the happiness I felt that we survived surpassed the feeling of grief and loss came and I haven't really talked much or done anything since.

I keep remembering the time we had together. Clarke you taught Lexa and I that love is strength and my time here with Monty and Harper and Emori and Murphy have only made me believe that more.

I know that wherever you are dead or alive you are together and happy. Which kinda makes me happy but also makes me miss you more.

Life moves slowly without the people in your life that make up your life. Right now my life is moving slower than it ever has before.

Life goes on and I'll keep going even if I have nothing left to live for.

I'll never forget you  
Mebi oso na hit choda op nodotime 

\- Lilia


	4. Chapter 4: The Second Letter

Dear Clarke and Lexa,

I guess I'm writing one of these every month now... it's been 5 months since primfaya so we have 4 years 7 months left up here.

It's gotten better, but I still feel like I have nothing left. Nothing left to live for.

My whole life was on earth and now it's gone. I lost my real partners when I was young but that doesn't change the fact that now knowing they're definitely gone hurts.

Earth and Polis was all I had, and you, my whole life was in polis. All I've done is train to be a commander, fight as a worrier for the commander and learn to one day lead my people. 

Now looking down on the destroyed earth I know I have nothing left and without you both I can't see the point of trying to find something to live for. 

If you are alive, which I'm starting to believe less and less, then I hope you are happy and when we find away to get back to the ground I will find you no matter what.

Until then I will keep my hope that you are alive even if that is more painful then accepting you're dead.

I remember when Clarke and I thought we were going to looked you Lexa. When Titus shot you and we didn't know if Abby could save you. The pain we felt.

I feel that pain everyday now except 100 times worse. When Clarke and I thought we had lost you Lexa, I thought I lost my mentor, my mum, and Clarke thought she lost the love of her life the only person who really understood her.

We went through that together, knew that if we did loose you we'd have eachother even if we'd never get over the pain.

We talked about loosing you and cried about it everyday until you miraculously got better. Knowing you were going to be ok was the best thing Clarke and I had ever heard.

We all got a second chance, this time we don't have that and I lost you both at the same time. For all I know you've lost eachother too. And that might just be more painful.

Thinking that one of you might be living without the other. I know your both strong but I don't know if you'd be that strong to live alone on earth. 

Clarke before primfaya Lexa told me she loves you more than anything and could never live without you. Lexa has never told anyone she loves them I know she's tried to tell you. Thinking about the fact that she might now have gotten to tell you feels like thousands of needles stabbing into me at once.

I never got to tell either of you I loved you before we were separated which had my deepest regret. Lexa when you said you loved me I did and ran out I was to caught up in you leaving to die to say it back. 

When you were finally able to talk properly after being shot the first thing you told me was that you regretted not telling Clarke you loved her when you had a chance and that was the thing you held onto so you could live and tell her.

If you are both no longer alive and wherever you are now are watching me write this, I'm trying everyday to go on but I don't know if I can without you.

Ai hod Yu in,  
Lilia


	5. The Third Letter

Dear Clarke And Lexa,

Wherever you are, are you with me? Are you watching me? Are you happy with who I've become?

I'm not, not happy with who I am or who I was.

It's been 6 months since primfaya and 1 month since my last letter. Monty was right the letters do help, they give me hope.

So I guess I will continue to write every month. Monty says he and raven could probably even come up with a way to send them down to the only green patch. 

That's where we assume you are. Did the radiation hit there or was it skipped over completely? Are there people there with you?... if your there alive.

So many questions that will never be answered. I'm beginning to think it's wrong to have hope. Even if you are alive I don't know if we'll make it back to earth. Maybe we will all just die up here in space.

Because I'm doubting that we will actually meet again and that there is a little more hoe that if you are alive you'll get this letter then see me. I've decided I'm going to write yiu the story of my life.

Or more so why I survived.

I was taken from my family when I was only a few months old because of my blood. I was brought up to either fight and die or win by killing everyone else.

My morals were always built around that, kill and live. I had no one to look after me just a flamekeepa who wanted me to be the next commander. 

I was only 4 when I met you Lexa, you were not yet a commander but would be soon. You were like me only you had, had some love before you were taken to polis. 

You were 14 when we met, 2 years later you would become the commander. I was the youngest nightblood by a lot. As soon as you saw me you swore to protect me. You didn't think it was right for a 4 year old man o be training with and potentially fighting to the death against people so much older.

You always helped me with my training and made me stronger. We came very close over the 2 years before you were made commander. You'd always comfort me when I had nightmares and help me stay in control during training and learning about the flame.

If only you were still here to do that. When you became commander I thought everything we had would change but it didn't. You saved my life to many times to count.

Your the reason I didn't have to fight in the conclave when I was only 6. You saved me from myself and everyone else. You let me be your second.

When you met Costia when you were 17 a year after you became commander I knew she made you happy. At first you thought she made you weak but you soon realised she didn't.

After Costia was killed 2 years later you shut down and hit your emotions from everyone but me. The long nights we spent lying under the starts after that we're some of the best times of my life. 

I felt at peace and I know you did as well. If only Titus didn't catch us you never would have shut me out and became the person I would never know.

You became a ruthless commander that everyone looked to. You United the 12 clans and everyone praised you for that. But you weren't the Lexa I knew. You were only using your head and forgot about your heart.

You always used to tell me to make a decision with my head but make sure my heart felt ok with it to. I think you forgot to do that for a long time.

Even though you were trying to shut out all emotions you still looked after me like you used to. That gave me hope that I could get you back one day.

But when you finally gave into what all the commanders say that love is weakness and everything we do must be about survival I knew you were gone.

Your decision to attack the sky people as soon as they landed reenforced that realisation even more. The Lexa that used to secretly comfort me and stand for what she believed to be right, the Lexa with a heart would have negotiated with the sky people first. 

I didn't know it then but having a walk up is much weaker then letting people in and feeling emotions, Clarke taught us both that. 

When Clarke was brought into your life from the first moment you looked at her when she walked into your tent I knew she could save you. And she did.

You started to feel again, you became the person I knew again maybe even better than before.

You started talking to me and spending time with me casually again, after almost 3 years. Clarke taught you what real weakness was.

Through her you learnt to see the world the way you used to and through others perspectives. 

I remember the day she told you that life should be about more than surviving. I was curious why your mood had changed so much. I knew from the minute she left the tent the first time you met her and you looked back at me with a look that I hadn't seen from you since Costia that you loved her.

So when you came into the tent that night I assumed she had kissed you or something but when you told me what she said I knew it have you more than any kiss could. It made you realise what you'd become.

You knew what you wanted and you knew you had to live not survive. You wanted to survive with Clarke.

You never told me about you first kiss with Clarke until much much later. But I could sense something had happened between you when you walked away at mount whether.

The person you'd become would never do that and I now know leaving her is your deepest regret. You loved Clarke more than anything in the world and I knew that.

Her rejecting you in a way made you think everything that she taught you was a lie. But as you walked away from mount whether you realised that wasn't true and she was just protecting herself and you. But you couldn't turn back.

Clarke when you finally came back to us after 3 months you hated Lexa. You talked to me about it.

You and I had become close over out mutual respect (love) for Lexa and in the days you were back at Polis not talking to Lexa you told me you hated her but I could tell you missed her.

You both finally got together and Titus shot Lexa. Like I've said so many times before Clarke and I thought we'd lost you Lexa.

We became so close over the time where we thought you were gone forever. Then you came back to Clarke in the flame even though your weren't conscious in out world you were still inside the AI and you helped Clarke like you always do.

Somehow I think you being in the City of light with Clarke helped you gain the strength to come back to us. 

Once you were better Clarke and I swore we'd never let anything happen to you again, I guess I kinda failed. We all became like a family.

We swore to survive together through primfaya that was obviously complicated because Lexa is the commander and we are the only two real night bloods left. 

We did everything we copied to stay together but were separated at the last minute. You both saved me and Bellamy and Monty and Harper and Murphy and Emori and Echo and Raven. They have become close to me now and continue to help me survive.

That doesn't mean I'll ever forget you both and if you are alive down there I hope my letters reach you. If your not alive I hope where ever you are your reading this.

Ai ste don foto hope  
Mebi oso na hit chodo op nadotime  
Kom hodness Lilia

Translation  
I still have false hope  
May we meet again  
With love Lilia


	6. The Forth Letter

Dear Clarke And Lexa,

It's been 11 months since primfaya and 4 months since my last letter.

Sorry I didn't write in so long, I've finally started to get used to the Ark and space. Monty also found a way to send the letters down to earth so if you are alive there is a chance you really will read my letters.

That thought gives me hope and because of that I've started loving again not just surviving for the sake of it.

The Ark is starting to feel more like somewhere I could live for the next 4 years. You were right Clarke your friends and just like you described them in your stories.

Although I much prefer earth the Ark has some redeeming qualities. There is so much to explore here.

Even though Bellamy, Murphy, Raven, Monty and Harper lived here for years they also havn't visited every part of the Ark so Emori and I have made it our mission to do so before them.

Speaking of Emori I know neither of you knew her very well and Clarke you were kinda willing to kill her (she mostly forgives you) I thought you'd like to know she is very interested in the Ark and space and Raven is teaching her how it all works.

Clarke I think you'd like to know that Bellamy is doing as good as any of us possibly can. In his true big brother way he is looking after everyone up here constantly. He misses you though, Octavia too. He has changed a lot in the time he's been up here, he is definitely not the same person that massacred the army.

I may as well just tell you how everyone is doing at this point.

Murphy is good but kind of falling apart a bit. Like Octavia the Ark was never really his home. He doesn't talk about it often but I heard him talking to Emori about his parents and time on the Ark. I think Murphy needs to be surviving to feel valuable. Maybe you should talk to him Clarke (if you see us again) and convince him like you convinced Lexa and I that life is about more than just surviving.

Monty is doing really really good. From the way he talks about the Ark I think he loved growing up here and has many good memories here. He still misses Jasper, he finally told everyone how he died, I'm sure he'll tell you one day Clarke. His algae is also going well it's gross but it works. Monty is also much smarter than I thought but he is just as kind as you said Clarke and I already know he would do anything for any of us.

I think Raven prefers earth but she also seems to like being on the Ark. I think she really likes having Emori around to teach. She is very different up here when she isn't constantly fighting for survival, I think we all are. She knows how almost everything works up here and explained a lot of it to Echo, Emori and I (I didn't understand any of it).

Speaking of Echo you were wrong Lexa, which is weird cause you are not often wrong, Echo isn't dangerous or selfish she is just loyal to her clan like everyone else. Like everyone she hold on to things that she has always known. She has changed since leaving Azgeda. K don't think any of us have truly forgiven her or trust her yet but she has changed and I relate to her most. We both had a place of earth all our lives and now being somewhere else it's weird.

Finally Harper she likes it here I think but she also wants to go back to her friends on earth. Harper is keeping us all together when someone looses it, which at first was a lot. 

Life up here is kind of starting to work but I miss earth and both of you. I really really hope Monty is right and if your alive you get this letter.

Oso kum na hit choda op nodotaim  
Lilia

Translation: we will meet again


	7. Clexa POV

Lexa lay her head in Clarke's lap gazing up at the stars letting the beautiful silence envelope her.

Ever since Primfaya the world had belonged to her and Clarke, she didn't have to worry about her people and they finally somewhat had their someday.

Although both girls new that in just a few years they would have to try again to open the bunker.

When Lexa had first found Clarke in Polis just 42 days after Primfaya she had been trying to open the bunker, with no success. Even with Lexa's help it was impossible to open.

They both agreed that if their friends had made it to space when they came back down they would get the bunker open.

If they didn't make it then Clarke and Lexa were what's left of the human race. Which distressed Clarke a lot more than Lexa.

Clarke has many friends and her mum in space and in the bunker but other than Clarke and Lilia Lexa has no one left she cares about.

Anya died, so did Lincoln and Costia and Aden which is exactly why Lexa couldn't not loose Clarke and had run after her before Primfaya leaving Lilia as safe as she could be with the others.

The brunette regrets this now wishing she'd have let Lilia come with her so all three of them could now be safe as a family. Lexa only hoped Lilia would be alive up in space waiting to come down to meet her again.

It had been almost a year since Primfaya and they had heard nothing from space or the bunker.

"Lex." Clarke mumbled. Lexa only hummed in response. Her and Clarke were sitting peacefully under the stars in the place looking over the valley with berries Clarke used to dye her hair.

The pair came there every so often for a change of scenery from the village of the Shallow Valley Clan. 

"You think they are really up there?" Clarke whispered. Clarke did everything she could to make sure her friends survived but was never given an answer to whether or not it had been enough.

Clarke radioed Bellamy and the others in space everyday praying for a reply but never receiving one. Clarke wasn't aware that Lexa knew she did it and the brunette planned to keep it that way.

Lexa knew Clarke needed to something to keep her hope and sanity. And as much as Clarke loved the time she now had with the love of her life she needed her friends and mother back to.

Lexa let out a deep sigh "I really, really hope they are." She said lifting herself from Clarke's lap to look at her properly.

Lexa took Clarke's face in her hand and slowly rubbed the blondes cheek with her thumb. "You did everything you could."

"But what if it wasn't enough?" Clarke questioned. Lexa let out a deep sigh and pulled the blonde into a hug letting Clarke's head rest in her shoulder.

"You have to have hope and right now this is our chance to live and not just survive." Lexa whispered.

Clarke nodded in response looking up to the dark night sky silently praying that her friends were alive up there.

After a moment of looking Clarke noticed something falling from the sky. It wasn't very big but it was large and close enough to see from where they were sitting.

"Oh my gosh!" Clarke exclaimed. "What's that?" As she looked closer she thought the object was a bomb and if that was the case they would need to move because it was coming right for them.

Lexa's head snapped around to where Clarke was looking searching for what she could be looking at. "What is that?" She asked

"No idea but it came from the sky and it's coming towards us fast." Lexa took another look at the object and realised it was.

"I think we should move." She suggested. "Is it a bomber if some sort?" Clarke questioned. Lexa looked closer and shook her head.

"It looks like a capsial of some sort." The object came closer to the girls and Clarke had to jump out of the object as it hit the ground hard right where she was sitting.

Lexa reached out to take a closer look at the object but Clarke hit her hand away from it. "What if something happens when you touch it." The blonde stated.

"Clarke it's just a capsiol it looks like there is something inside it anyway." Lexa replied picking up the object and opening it.

Inside the capsiol there were four more smaller ones. Lexa opened the first one and pulled out a piece of paper and studied it a moment.

"What is it?" Clarke said in a low voice. Lexa's eyes darted up to meet Clarke's then quickly went back to the letter in her hand.

"Oh my god what does it say?" Clarke asked moving to see the letter. "Who's it from?"

"Lilia..."

"What!?" Clarke exclaimed. "She's alive? What did she say?"

Lexa nodded slowly taking in the letter. Honestly even though Lexa had always reassured Clarke that her friends were alive Lexa never fully believed herself.

For the past year ish she had felt guilt for leaving Lilia behind to potentially die without anyone she knew.

"Lex." Clarke said pulling her from her thoughts. "Can you read it please." Lexa looked up at her a moment them nodded.

Dear Clarke and Lexa,

I know you have been gone a while now, almost 4 months but everyday I wake up thinking about you and all I've lost. But if you see this you saved us. We are all here alive.

"She thought we were dead." Lexa said guilty. "But her and the other alive." Clarke said. "And that's all that matters.

"How are we supposed to tell them that we're alive." Clarke on shrugged knowing that her radioing them wasn't working but that didn't mean she'd stop.

"Keep reading see what else she has to say."

Life goes on and I'll keep going even if I have nothing left to live for.

I'll never forget you  
Mebi oso na hit choda op nodotime 

\- Lilia

Lexa whispered the last part of the letter. She looked up at Clarke who had tears running down her face.

"We did it they actually survived." She exclaimed. "You did it." Lexa corrected her.

"Read the rest of the letters." Lexa nodded at pulled the next one out. They spent the rest of the night reading the four letters over and over again.

A few hours before dusk the pair went back to the rover to sleep. 

*************

The sun was just peaking through the gaps in the windows of their rover the next morning when Clarke woke.

Lexa was lying on her chest head placed perfectly in the crook of her neck. Clarke carefully sat up so she wouldn't wake Lexa and moved out of the rover.

The blonde grabbed the radio from the top of the rover and moved to sit of the edge of the valley.

After a moment she begun to speak. "Bellamy, Lilia if you can hear this it's been 336 days since Primfaya. I got your letters Lilia. Thank god your all still alive. The bunker is still silent. But Lexa and I we're alive. If your listening we are alive." Clarke paused and waited for a reply.

After 10 minutes of waiting none came. "I guess I'll see you in 5 years and then you'll know that we're alive." She finished and turned the radio off going back to Lexa. Who had been listening the whole time.


	8. The Fifth Letter

Dear Clarke And Lexa,

It's been 1 year since primfaya. Monty just sent my four letters to the ground I'm hoping by some miracle that you received them abs that your alive.

As soon as I've written this one Monty'll send it down.

I don't have much to say today. Everything is moving slowly.

When we first got here I was overwhelmed by the saddest of loss and grief as I had lost everything and one that I knew.

Then slowly I felt not happy but not so lost because you here you feel free, I don't have to answer to anyone and I get to learn so much more about differ ways of life.

But now I feel numb. I'm not happy, not sad, I'm nothing.

I miss the sound of the rain but I love seeing the stars from here.

I miss the feel of moss under my feet but I love the sound of nothing alone in my room at night.

I miss laughing with my friends after training.

I miss watching the stars with you Lexa and Clarke when you used to join us.

I miss earth and my people their.

But I like the family I have here to and space has its ups.

I think if you were both here I'd accept space for all that it is but I still feel something is missing up here and it's taken writing this letter to realise that it's both of you.

That's not to say I haven't grow to care greatly for everyone here.

I mean I love how Raven is so smart and willing to help.

I love bellamys caring nature towards everyone.

Emoris ideas and humour in her differences.

Murphy's will to survive and stories.

Montys and Harpers kindness.

And echos courage and will to adapt.

They all have qualifies that make living here so great and easy.

But between both of you, you have them all and I miss that eveyday.

\- Lilia


	9. The Sixth Letter

Dear Clarke And Lexa,

It's been 547 days since primfaya (1 and a half years). I've almost forgotten what Earth is like.

What it sounds like.

Feels like.

Smells like.

I know it's weird but nothing is really the same up here so there is nothing to help me remember.

I think I remember the smell of rain. I remember being my favourite sent. 

I remember everytime it rained I would run around in it in the forest or in the training space. Then either you, Lexa, or Titus would come get us and bring us back to what ever suit us we had to for fill.

Titus, I still hate him for what you did to you and all that he cause because of your almost death. If You hadn't survived Lexa I'd probably be dead like the other night bleeders and Ontari would be Heda.

I can't even imagine where you'd be right now if Lexa was dead Clarke. Would you be in the bunker? In space with us? Or where you are right now only alone.

That is if you are alive... and together.

Do you still love eachother the way you used to? They way I want to be love. Just like you both show to others and have learnt through eachother. 

I don't want to be afraid to be in love or to love who I want, freely fully without reservation. I want to find my people whoever they are.

And I thought I had that on the ground I had you both as my family... as my people, I had friends and I had Toni, she was always with me when you wernt.

But now I know she is dead, I know my friends are gone and I don't know what's happening to either of you.

How do you rebuild something you never really had. Something you had to make for yourself but was actually made by the people around you? How do you do that when last time it felt like it was done for you?

You don't.

I lost my parents. I loved them.

I lost Toni. I was pretty sure I loved her.

And now I've lost both of you. I know I love(d)  
you.

I want to find strength in myself. I want to make a life where we're not always doing and trying and fighting.

Why must we always fight? Isn't fighting what got us here in the first place? Could you both not have been happier together sooner if there was no fighting? Or trying for a cause that is useless to really surviving.

You both taught me that life is about more than just surviving. And yet all anyone does is survive.

I want a life where we can just be.

No more surviving just living. I do get that up here but because of the life we lived on the ground there will always be a burden.

I want a life were we can just be.

Do you think we'll ever get that?

\- Lilia


	10. The Seventh Letter

Dear Clarke And Lexa,

It's been 547 days since primfaya (1 and a half years). I've almost forgotten what Earth is like.

What it sounds like.

Feels like.

Smells like.

I know it's weird but nothing is really the same up here so there is nothing to help me remember.

I think I remember the smell of rain. I remember being my favourite sent. 

I remember everytime it rained I would run around in it in the forest or in the training space. Then either you, Lexa, or Titus would come get us and bring us back to what ever suit us we had to for fill.

Titus, I still hate him for what you did to you and all that he cause because of your almost death. If You hadn't survived Lexa I'd probably be dead like the other night bleeders and Ontari would be Heda.

I can't even imagine where you'd be right now if Lexa was dead Clarke. Would you be in the bunker? In space with us? Or where you are right now only alone.

That is if you are alive... and together.

Do you still love eachother the way you used to? They way I want to be love. Just like you both show to others and have learnt through eachother. 

I don't want to be afraid to be in love or to love who I want, freely fully without reservation. I want to find my people whoever they are.

And I thought I had that on the ground I had you both as my family... as my people, I had friends and I had Toni, she was always with me when you wernt.

But now I know she is dead, I know my friends are gone and I don't know what's happening to either of you.

How do you rebuild something you never really had. Something you had to make for yourself but was actually made by the people around you? How do you do that when last time it felt like it was done for you?

You don't.

I lost my parents. I loved them.

I lost Toni. I was pretty sure I loved her.

And now I've lost both of you. I know I love(d)  
you.

I want to find strength in myself. I want to make a life where we're not always doing and trying and fighting.

Why must we always fight? Isn't fighting what got us here in the first place? Could you both not have been happier together sooner if there was no fighting? Or trying for a cause that is useless to really surviving.

You both taught me that life is about more than just surviving. And yet all anyone does is survive.

I want a life where we can just be.

No more surviving just living. I do get that up here but because of the life we lived on the ground there will always be a burden.

I want a life were we can just be.

Do you think we'll ever get that?

\- Lilia


	11. The Eight Letter

Dear Clarke And Lexa,

It's been 547 days since primfaya (1 and a half years). I've almost forgotten what Earth is like.

What it sounds like.

Feels like.

Smells like.

I know it's weird but nothing is really the same up here so there is nothing to help me remember.

I think I remember the smell of rain. I remember being my favourite sent. 

I remember everytime it rained I would run around in it in the forest or in the training space. Then either you, Lexa, or Titus would come get us and bring us back to what ever suit us we had to for fill.

Titus, I still hate him for what you did to you and all that he cause because of your almost death. If You hadn't survived Lexa I'd probably be dead like the other night bleeders and Ontari would be Heda.

I can't even imagine where you'd be right now if Lexa was dead Clarke. Would you be in the bunker? In space with us? Or where you are right now only alone.

That is if you are alive... and together.

Do you still love eachother the way you used to? They way I want to be love. Just like you both show to others and have learnt through eachother. 

I don't want to be afraid to be in love or to love who I want, freely fully without reservation. I want to find my people whoever they are.

And I thought I had that on the ground I had you both as my family... as my people, I had friends and I had Toni, she was always with me when you wernt.

But now I know she is dead, I know my friends are gone and I don't know what's happening to either of you.

How do you rebuild something you never really had. Something you had to make for yourself but was actually made by the people around you? How do you do that when last time it felt like it was done for you?

You don't.

I lost my parents. I loved them.

I lost Toni. I was pretty sure I loved her.

And now I've lost both of you. I know I love(d)  
you.

I want to find strength in myself. I want to make a life where we're not always doing and trying and fighting.

Why must we always fight? Isn't fighting what got us here in the first place? Could you both not have been happier together sooner if there was no fighting? Or trying for a cause that is useless to really surviving.

You both taught me that life is about more than just surviving. And yet all anyone does is survive.

I want a life where we can just be.

No more surviving just living. I do get that up here but because of the life we lived on the ground there will always be a burden.

I want a life were we can just be.

Do you think we'll ever get that?

\- Lilia


	12. The Last Letter

Dear Clarke and Lexa.

It's been 2192 days since primfaya. (6 years) The bunker was supposed to be out a year ago so hopefully you and Lexa are no longer alone.

I sort of forgot about writing these letters but I've never forgot about either of you I swear.

This will however be my last letter because tomorrow we will be trying to get to the ground.

There is a ship that is coming towards us we are going to use it to come down.

I'm not sure if Monty will send this letter but I'm hoping he will so I can say goodbye.

None of us are really sure of this will work and even if it does we may it make it to the ground alive.

If you get this letter thank you for everything and goodbye. 

If we do however survive I cannot wait to see you again.

It will be weird as I've pretty much forgotten what earth is like and I've gotten so used for the nothing feeling of space.

I've also changed a lot so has everyone else up here and I'm sure you both have to.

The last time I saw you I was the last noviciate nightblood left, I was 12 moons old.

That's all there really was to me now I'm 18 moons old the same age you were turning Clarke when you were sent to the ground.

And like you learnt so much form earth I've learnt a lot from my time her in the ring.

I will either see you very soon or this is good bye.

\- Lilia


	13. Clexas POV pt.2

Clarke and Lexa were making their usual monthly trip to the edge of the valley. They took this trip monthly partly to have a change from their usual surroundings and partly to see if any more letters had dropped down.

They had been making this trip monthly for the past 6 months and their had been no more letters. It had now been a year since primfaya and Lexa could tell Clarke was loosing hope about the bunker as there had still only been silence from them and the people in space.

As they pulled up to their normal spot and got out Clarke noticed a small shiny captioal. She quickly got out of the car and ran to the spot, Lexa close behind her.

In silence Clarke grabbed the captioal and opened it pulling out just one letter. Carefully Clarke unrolled the letter and clearly begun to read over it silently. "Out loud please." Lexa said breaking the long silence.

Clarke nodded and begun to read out load.  
Once she had finished reading the letter she rolled it back up and put it back in the captioal.

"Now we just need to know the bunkers still alive." Clarke said relief washing over her face. Lexa nodded and as much as she did want everyone of her people in the bunker alive she loved the simply life she had now acquired with Clarke alone.

Clarke must have seen the unsure look on Lexa's face because she reached out and placed a hand under her chin lifting it so Lexa would look her right in the eyes. "The world will be different when the bunker reopens, people will be different. It will be easier to strive for peace I promise."

Lexa nodded and moved closer to Clarke making their foreheads touch before she connected their lips. Clarke lips were so soft making Lexa melt into the kiss and instantly feel more at ease.

**************

"Clarke." Lexa groaned as Clarke got up out of the bed leaving her cold. "Come back." She said sitting up pulling her arm back. Clarke turned around and kissed her forehead.

"Nope, we have places to be." Lexa pouted, Clarke leaned down and kissed the pout off. "Can't we just wait 5 more minutes?" Lexa smirked pulling Clarke closer to the bed. Clarke only shook her head so Lexa sighed and got up.

Once they were both up they walked to the Rover. "Your turn to drive Lex." Clarke motioned for her to get into the divers seat. At that Lexa shook her head. She sucked at driving.

"No thanks I'm not looking to leave you be the only person left on earth." Clarke laughed but still pushed her into the front seat and took the passenger seat.

"You'll be fine." Clarke reassured her as Lexa started the car. Lexa only shrugged and begun driving.

"It's been over 6 months since the last letter what makes you think there'll be one now." Lexa said. Clarke shot her an annoyed look. Lexa didn't think their friends in space were dead she just thought they had forgotten about the letters.

Lexa watched as Clarke's face turned from annoyed to sad so she immediately re worded what she meant. "We know they're ok what if they're just living their life and have forgotten the letters."

"It's not all about the letters Lexa." Clarke said angrily. "I usually like making this trip with you. Lexa sighed she knew the letters meant a lot to Clarke if gave her hope for not only the people in space but also that through some miracle her mum would be ok.

"Sorry, I know the letters are important to you." Lexa whispered. Clarke nodded and gave her a small smile. The rest of the trip was in silence.

Once they got to their usual spot Clarke jumped out of the car and walked over to the log they rest on. "Any letter?" Lexa called. Clarke shook her head.

Lexa walked over and wrapped her arms around Clarke. "Next month there'll be one." Lexa half promised running her fingers through Clarke's hair.

They stood there for a moment before Lexa noticed something floating down from the sky. "Clarke! Look!" She said in excitement. Clarke's head snapped up and looked to where she had been looking.

Clarke reached out and grabbed the floating captioal. "Oh my god Lex!" Clarke hurriedly opened the captioal and pulled the letter out. The two sank down only the floor as Clarke begun to read the letter.

Both Lexa and Clarke felt some relief they hadn't been forgotten about.

*************

Clarke and Lexa were making their way towards the lake to wash off from the day before they made their trip to the edge of the valley.

It had been another six months with no letter and they were starting to suspect that letters only came once every six months. Still they made the trip monthly just for the fun of it.

When they got to the lake they walked to the edge before pulling their cloths off and jumping in.

Clarke shivered at the cold water and Lexa swam over puller Clarke's body into her own. Clarke intertwined their legs and they stayed in the warm comforting position a while before Lexa smirked and pulled away.

"What are you doing?" Clarke asked cautiously. Lexa just continued to smirk. They splashed around in the water a while longer before they decided it was time to get out.

Once they're were out of the water and somewhat dry Lexa picked Clarke up bridal style and begun to carry her back to the water. Lexa got close enough that she could sadly throw Clarke back in.

"No. No. No Lexa what are you doing?" Clarke squirmed in her arms. Once Lexa was close enough she threw Clarke but since Clarke had refused to unwrap her arms from around Lexa's neck it had pulled they both back in.

They both laughed for a bit before deciding it was really time to get going. They got out got dry and dressed then started their drive.

Once they got to their normal spot they both hoped out of the car at the same time and walked over to the log hand in hand.

To their surprise there was indeed a letter. Lexa picked up the captioal and opened it pulling the letter out. Lexa unravelled the letter and passed it to Clarke to read.

Once they finished reading the letter they relaxed into eachother and slowly fell asleep.

************

It had been a whole year since the last letter and Lexa had fully lost any hope that another would come but they were still on their way to their spot by the valley just like every month to see if one had come.

Clarke was driving and Lexa was in the passenger seat as usual. Clarke turned to look at Lexa a moment and noticed she look pale.  
"You ok?" Clarke asked moving one hand from the steering wheel to place on Lexa's head. It was very warm.

In response to Clarke's questions Lexa went into a fit of coughs. "Just relax and close your eyes we'll be there soon." Clarke instructed. Nodding Lexa closed her eyes and fell asleep moments later.

Once their got their Clarke shook Lexa awake and helped her out of the car. Together they walked down to the log. Clarke placed Lexa down and looked around for a letter. Nothing.

Clarke was determined to find one so she decided she would look around a bit. "I know going for a walk." She announced to Lexa who nodded slightly. "I'll be back soon stay here ok."

At that Clarke begun to walk down the valley. After about ten minutes of walking Clarke thought she should head back to Lexa because she had probably started coming after her by now and will get herself killed.

As Clarke turned to walk back shade something shiny under the long grass and reached down to grab it. It was a letter!

Clarke ran back to Lexa who thankfully was still where Clarke left her. "I found a letter." Clarke smiled and Lexa opened her eyes to see. Clarke sat down next to Lexa and let Lexa rest her head on Clarkes chest.

Clarke's pulled out the letter with one hand the other rubbing Lexa's arm. Clarke looked down at Lexa who's eyes were closed but she seemed to be awake. Clarke begun to read the letter out loud.

By the time Clarke had finished reading the letter Lexa was asleep. Clarke carried her back to the Rover laying blankets down as a makeshift bed. Clarke put Lexa down in the rover and lay next to her.

*************

It had been years since the last letter. The bunker was supposed to be open by now and their friends in space were supposed to be back on earth. Clarke and Lexa had stopped making their monthly trips to the valley.

They were both lying peacefully by the fire looking up at the stars when Lexa shot up. "We should go visit the valley." Clarke sat up and looked at her weirdly.

"I just feel like we need to go visit ok." Lexa explain and was already walking to the Rover before Clarke could object. Lexa was already in the drivers seat of the rover before Clarke had gotten up and followed her.

They begun the drive to the valley. Once they got they it was the very late part of the night. Clarke got out of the rover and walked to the log. To her complete surprise there was a letter sitting right in the log. "Oh my god." She whispered under her breath.

Lexa came up behind her and say the letter, she smiled as Clarke begun to read: 

This will however be my last letter because tomorrow we will be trying to get to the ground.

At that Lexa and Clarke's eyes lit up. "They're coming back to the ground!" Clarke's said in disbelief pulling Lexa into a bone crushing hug. "Ok keep reading." Lexa said and Clarke went on:

If you get this letter thank you for everything and goodbye. 

If we do however survive I cannot wait to see you again.

I will either see you very soon or this is good bye.

"They'll survive." Lexa said confidently. "Your friends always do." Clarke wasn't so sure they would but she had hope she'd finally have her friends back.


	14. Clexas POV pt.3

It had been 7 days since Clarke and Lexa had been to the valley and read Lilias last letter. They were heading back to the valley to write one letter back.

Clarke and Lexa both agreed they're give their letter to Lilia if she made it to the ground.

It was Lexas idea to write the letter because he still had hope that they would see Lilia and her people again. Clarke on the other hand had pretty much lost all hope. Clarke wanted to believe they'd get the bunker open and space kru would make it to the ground but she wasn't sure.

"How do we even start this letter Lexa for all we know we are all that's left of the human race." Clarke huffs annoyed. Lexa looks up at Clarke solemnly.

"We can't be what's left." Lexa says pausing letting out a sigh. "That would mean that I failed my people and your people and you and Lilia. I can't live with that, there needs to be hope."

Clarke saw the broken expression on Lexas fave and pulled her into a loving hug. "You didn't fail, the human race did." Clarke whispers to her and feel Lexas tears on her cheek.

She hadn't even noticed Lexa had started crying, it's such a rare occurrence that Lexa cries. In fact Lexa has only ever cried infront of Clarke and Anya whom she used to be a second to.

"I'm with you." Clarke whispers with a sigh. "Let's write the letter." Lexa looks up at Clarke and smiles weakly with glassy eyes.

And keep radioing every day she thinks. Clarke doesn't know that Lexa is aware of her radioing to Lilia and Bellamy everyday. 

The pair get started on the letter, it's long and they pour their hearts into it. Talking about there time on earth alone together. How much they miss everyone. How the letters from Lilia have given them all the hope they need to survive. And how they will get their people out of the bunker.

When they finish writing they look up at eachother. Both with hope and live in their eyes.

The two just sit and stare at eachother a moment before Clarke leans in and placed her had on Lexas cheek. 

Lexa leans in and closes the gap between them. Every time their lips touch the eyes pain of the world leaves and they are left with only live. Forgetting about the problems and loss around them.

That's one thing Lexa will miss when they get there people back. She won't have Clarke all to her self and she'll have to go back to being the strong emotionless leader she was.

When they finally pull apart Clarke says "If... when" she corrects herself. "When we meet the others again we give this letter to Lilia and she decides what to do with it." 

"It was a reply to her letter and hope for us, so yes she should have it." Lexa nods. Lexa move to face Clarke properly looking at her in awe. 

Clarke saved her in so many ways. Clarke fixed her and saved her from the way she thought was rights. Taught her love is strength and that life should be about more than just surviving.

Those were the last words she thought she say to Clarke when Titus shot her but it turns out she instead survived and finally got to live... with Clarke.

"Wanna go down to the cliff of the valley before it starts to get dark?" Lexa smiles. Clarke smiles back at her more brightly than she had in a long time. The letter really had given her more hope.

"Of course, let's go get the night stuff and the rover." Clarke her replies getting up off the couch and putting her hand out for Lexa to help her up. Lexa gladly excepts the hand and they walk side by side to the rover.

"I can't imagine a world without you." Clarke whispers to Lexa and they drive along. The sky was turning to dawn and looked beautiful.

"I told you, I'll always be with you." Lexa hums in reply looking at Clarke with love. "I could never let go of you." Lexa says.

Clarke thinks back to when she almost lost Lexa and how lonely she felt. She was so scared she would loose Lexa even Lexa seemed to give up in her self.

But when Clarke had confessed her love for the girl next to her all those years ago she promised she'd always be with Clarke. Which was so much more powerful and confessed so much more love then saying I love you to.

Those words are their words and it's true Lexa would always be with Clarke.

As they pulled up at their usual spot Clarke looked down at Lexa who looked back at her. Lexa smile before saying.

"I love you."


	15. Space Krus POV

"Well we just almost died." Murphy says looking at Emori sarcastically. I love Murphy but it would be a great time to grow up. 

Emori looks back at him and glares then looks down. "Hey it's fine we made it and we're alive." I reassure her smiling. She looks up but doesn't return the smile.

"Ok we need to make this quick there could still be people on the ship." Bellamy says. "Harper you stay with Emori and secure the ship. Monty and Murphy you go try to find the full to get us to the ground. And Raven you and Lilia come with me and we'll find the controls."

I nod and get out of the ship following Raven to where we think the controls might be. "This ship is huge." I say looking around. 

After a minute or so if walking we find the control room. It's massive and has a big window a the front looking out to Earth. 

I miss Earth, I havn't been down there in 6 years. From what we have seen there is only one green patch the rest of earth is destroyed. 

"I wonder who these people where." Raven thinks out load. "I don't know but I don't really want to find out." Bellamy replies.

Raven keeps looking around at the controls trying to work out how to turn the on. "We got the fuel or what we thing could work." Monty says coming up behind us.

"Ok we should get back to Emori and Har-," Bellamy says getting cut of by the sound of a static radio.

"Lilia, Bellamy if you can here me, if your alive it's been 2199 days since primfaya." The voice from the radio says all broken up from the bad connection.

Bellamy and I look at eachother eyes wide. We know exactly who that is. "Clarke!" We exclaim at the same time running over to the radio. 

"Clarke, Clarke can you here us?" I say. "How does this radio work none of ours work on the Ark." Bellamy asks as I keep trying to get through to Clarke. "They have laze come radios the connection is strong enough to go through earths atmosphere." Monty explains.

I keep trying to get through to Clarke but it's not working so I stop and listen again. "Is that you?!" She says excited. "I thought I heard a connection I don't know crackling from the other side."

"It's probably just my mind playing tricks on me." She says disappointed. "I don't even know why I do this everyday, maybe it's my way of staying sane. Lexa doesn't even know I do it but she still believes your alive even though you haven't sent a letter in almost a year." Clarke pauses.

Lexa! She alive. And they were getting my letters. "Monty whatever you did to get those letters to the ground it worked!" I exclaim tuning into his arms to thank him. Clarke starts talking again.

"I've missed you all. Having only two people left on Earth sucks sometimes. We tried to open the bunker multiple times but it's gone silent since the last time we were there. I'm afraid Lexa and I are the only ones left if the human race." She sighs deeply. "If your out there somewhere listening please come back, the earth has been survivable for other a year."

"Clarke." I hear Lexa voice and running. "Look up!" She says surprised. "Actually don't worry about that I see you." Clarke says with relief.

"How does she see us?" Echo says. I hadn't even noticed her come in. "That's not us." Raven says. "That's the ship we saw go down."

"We have to tell them." I say frantically. "Clarke, Lexa if you hear me that's not us!" No no no I think I can't loose them now when I'm so close to getting them back. "Clarke

"We have to get back to them, back to earth help them with the bunker as well." Bellamy says looking frantic.

"Ok, ok Bellamy you and Lilia go get the others Emori will take you down to earth I know she can." Raven explains calmly.

"What about the people at own this ship who are now on earth." I remind her. Raven gives me a look as to say i know I'm greying to think of that.

"Ok I got it." Raven says slightly flustered. "I'll stay here have control of there sleeping army of prisoners and you go down that way we have leverage."

I begins to nod that's a good idea. "No." Bellamy says sternly. "What why!?" I question.

Why wouldn't we do this, for that past 6 years I thought Clarke and Lexa had died saving us now I know there alive and we can go see them AND their lives are potentially in danger we have to go this plan is fine.

"Because I will not leave Raven up here with no way down alone." 

"Bellamy I'll be fine trust me." Raven tries to reason. "No we can find another way." Raven sighs and looks at him. "Come one Bellamy you know there is no other way."

"There has to be." He says not willing to let her stay alone. "I'll come down after you there's a drop ship." Raven says not meeting his eyes.

There's no drop ship I don't know what she's talking about. Raven told us she was going to look for one earlier and never found one.

"Really?" Bellamy raises his eyebrow at her. "Yes! Yes there is no go and get everyone you ha to get back to the ground." She pushes him away in a rush.

"Go get everyone back to the ship I'll meet you there." I tell him knowing this is the last I'll see Raven.

Once Bellamy had left I turned towards Raven and she pulled me into a tight hug. "You don't have to do this we can find another way I whisper." I feel her shake her head against me.

"No go find Clarke and Lexa, go get out people out of the bunker I'll be fine up here." She reassures me. 

Ever since we've been in space raven has been so optimistic and helped everyone I can't imagine my life without here anymore. I pull out of the hug.

"May we meet again." I say before turn to go to the ship. "May we meet again." I hear her voice shake and I turn around to give her one past smile and wave before leaving.

On my way down the hallway towards the ship I see Murphy walking towards me. "Lilia, you sure you don't want to stay with raven and I?" He smirks at me.

I stop and stare at him a moment why is he staying. "Your gonna die just getting down to earth with Emori flying." He jokes.

"You don't mean that." I say harshly "And I have a better chance down there than you here." He looks taken aback by my gosh words.

What do you mean Raven'll just bring us down later." No one told him there was no way down. "Yeah, yeah that right sorry." I mutter.

I really don't want to loose Murphy as well even though he kinda lost it again on the Ark he has been kind to me ever since I met him in Polis when Lexa got shot.

I say my final goodbye to Murphy and make my way to the pod we will ride in back down to earth. I strap in next to Bellamy and Monty.

"Ok everyone ready?" Emori asks in a shaky voice. Everyone nods and we start our terrifying journey to the ground.

**Author's Note:**

> I don’t think I mentioned that half the story will be in letters and the other half irl


End file.
